LovingHim-RaisingThem

I have been battling a lot again with guilt and insecurity, especially in regards to how I spend my time.

I know every day is a gift from God and I don’t want to waste time or spend it on things that are out of line with Gods plans for me. As tozer said ‘remember when we kill time, it has no resurrection’

We are still ‘van less ‘ so there is still a lot more walking than usual. This has afforded me the space to ponder and wrestle with the issue of how I personally spend my time.

As is true for many, lots of how I spend my time is out of my hands doing the essential day to day jobs. But there is some margin where I do have the opportunity to choose. From the beginning of time Gods plan has always been for us to be able to choose. To have free will to either go our own way, led by external influences or our own desires. Or to partner with him and be led by the Spirit.

The difficult thing about it is there is no right or wrong answer, no ‘one size fits all’ no specific path to follow. Instead we are presented with a journey, one that is to be taken minute by minute, day by day, season by season. The journey of walking with God, listening for His small still voice calling to us….’this is the way, walk in it’

Learning to hear this voice takes time, time of getting to know our father in heaven. It also takes intentionality and perseverance, there is a lot of other noise clamouring for our attention.

There is the physical noise around us of our families, the tv, music, and friends. But also the noise of our own selfish desires, brokenness and the culture that surrounds us.

After some serious reflection I have realised the root of why I have been feeling guilty and insecure about how I spend my time, and it is simply this…..comparison. Without even realising I have been seeing how other mums, other Christians, people I look up to spend their time and using that as the benchmark to view how I spend my time, the fruit of it has been guilt.

The bible calls us all to play our part in Christs body, and to run our own race. If you want to fail miserably at this than I can tell you the answer. Compare yourself to others and listen to every influence available!

Success however will come from coming to God in humility and asking him to search your heart and assess your motives. Your journey is your journey and my prayer is that you will grow in confidence to walk in out with peace and strength knowing you only have God to answer to.

How we all spend our days will look so different from each other, and the truth is only God knows our heart and our motives. So let’s give each other grace, support and encouragement as we all play our part.

Be so blessed

Emma x