LovingHim-RaisingThem

Life as a mum is constantly shifting and evolving, it requires so much flexibility, patience, humility, grace  and love. Just as you learn how to handle one situation, another one creeps up and smacks you in the face. It demands your whole self and if you feel like a day off to call in sick, guess what? You can’t! It’s kind of a 24/7 situation.

Call in sick we can’t, but rest and restore we must.

Jesus teaches us “from the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks”

The state of our heart will seep out and affect every part of our lives. Particularly the lives of our families. We are foolish to think we can give out constantly without ever pausing to recieve and fill up ourselves. 

In our busy and demanding culture finding rest is a battle.

There are so many ways to do this, and it will look so different for all of us. But it is essential to our connection to God and to the quality of life we pour into others that we seek out sustainable rhythms. 

What works for our family probably won’t work for yours and what works for yours probably won’t work for your friend down the street. To top it off what worked for you last year, just might not work this year! It’s something that needs to evolve as our family does. We all have our own challenges, work commitments and family dynamics to work with so comparison, as usual, is useless!

The key is to partner with God in prayer to find some ‘anchor points’

An anchor is ‘a person or thing which provides stability or confidence in an otherwise uncertain situation.’ It’s what grounds you in life and holds firm in any storm.

Maybe it will be helpful to think of them in catorgories. ( I have included personal examples for reference, they are not meant to be prescriptive) 

Anchor point 1. Values.

So for me this would be my Christian faith. Something always there holding me firm through life. This one doesn’t change it’s just there. A commitment to marriage etc

Anchor point 2. Yearly 

For jon and I we have committed to a  night away together every year since we’ve had kids. It’s become something so special and life giving… Not an anchor point we intend changing. When we’ve been broke it’s been a very budget event and when we can it’s been a spa or trip away.

Anchor point 3 monthly 

Every month we have some sort of adventure as a whole family for a whole day, away from commitments, pressures and jobs.

Every month jon and I try to give each other some form of alone time. We go up and down with our commitment to this, when we don’t make it happen the strain shows. For us alone time is essential to our Wellbeing.

Anchor point 4 weekly

We practise a loose form of sabbath. Saturday looks and feels different to every other day…the kids love having our attention and time. It provides an opportunity for great conversations and memory making. The busier we get the more sacred it becomes. It’s not strict or complicated, it just stops the treadmill.

After almost 10years of parenting today we reached a place where our youngest started nursery and it will allow us 2 hours together on a Monday morning for a date. After moving away from family and babysitters this is a timely gift.

Anchor point 4 daily

Bible reading, prayer, friendship, solitude, a cup of tea with a view….daily anchor points are just moments where we remember what’s really important and we recieve tiny grace notes to help us through our day

If your life is anything like mine, I’m sure it’s jam packed with paid or unpaid work, cooking, cleaning, organising, getting everyone to where they need to be, interrupted sleep and never ending to do lists….it’s fine to have a break! If taking a break doesn’t come easy to you, then start slow and simple. Otherwise what started positively will soon become a source of stress. A few women in our wee community have been looking at this and our diversity is fascinating! But we all agree that it’s worth the fight for healthy minds and families.
I encourage you to journey to find your anchor points…and please share any wisdom you discover
Emma