Your love breaks down my prison


I love how God can speak to us in and through all circumstances. I’m a person who loves to be outside in creation and I go there to connect with God and refresh my soul whenever I can. But the reality of my everyday life is that most of my time I’m looking after children, cooking, cleaning, working and running around after everyone.

Monday morning was its normal beautiful chaos, and as we all ready for school and work and my heart and mind were in a bad place. I’d been struggling for a couple of weeks. Drowning it to do lists and anxious thoughts I was starting to panic, as I bent down to clean the toilet I prayed a quick prayer of help to God and I heard His loving responce 

‘You have a choice here, to keep spiralling in anxiety or find your way back to me’

I was tempted to choose to spiral if I’m honest, I just couldn’t find the strength, time or the inclination to come back to Him…it was easier to wallow and attack my to do list. I tried to just pray on my own on the way to work but the slightest things kept setting me off. In the end I called a friend who knows my heart and my story. She prayed and spoke truth into my heart and together we dispelled the lies I has been believing and I realigned with truth.

It was simple, powerful and beautiful. 

We were created to live in community, to share our struggles, and to love and strengthen one another. It’s ok to need help sometimes.

It all starts with a choice.

Leaning over cleaning my toilet I could have chosen to ignore God, shove it all down, ‘put my best foot forward’ attack my day and be panicking and spiralling down inside. Outwardly no one would know, things would get done….not with love really though and I would be snapping at those I care about the most as I struggled in my own strength.

Gods love breaks down our prisons. The ones that build up in our hearts and minds. There are lots of theories about the battles that go on in our minds. Whether it’s hormones, emotional, spiritual, circumstantial or some sort of combination, to be honest it doesn’t matter.

If it’s a lie…just don’t partner with it. 

Your thoughts are where it all begins. As we walk with God he promises us freedom, but we still have to choose it every single day. (Read Ephesians 6:10-20)

Sometimes we are walking on the cliff tops in the sunshine, sometimes we are cleaning the toilet. God speaks to us everywhere. We can always choose Him, we can always choose truth.

I just spent about half an hour listening to Jonathan Helser singing East from West, drowning my soul in truth. Sometimes we just need to seek out and marinate in His love for us.

I’m smiling and peaceful as I sit here because HE IS GOOD and  Monday morning I chose well. 

I love this journey with God I find myself on, I’m praying that someone out there will find freedom today from this.

His love breaks down my prison…..

Love Emma